SINCE PETE ABSOLON'S DEATH, Luke Rodolph has lived quietly in Casper. He works for his brother's landscaping service and spends a lot of time praying and trying to "stay focused on my walk with Christ." The news that he wouldn't be prosecuted was no cause for celebration.
"I don't know if it was a relief or not," he says, sitting at the kitchen table in Aaron's house, occasionally wiping away tears with his sleeve. "Sometimes you feel like you should have to pay for what you have done. At this point, I've accepted that this is what God wants. But I take full responsibility for what I did. Pete's death was my fault. I can't ever justify it."
Aaron nods solemnly. "I'll never throw another rock off a cliff," he says. "My dad told me, ‘That was an ignorant thing to do.' Whether everybody else does it or not, whether you looked or you didn't, it doesn't matter. Maybe our experience up there just makes us more guilty."
Before the memorial service near Sinks Canyon, the Rodolph brothers inquired discreetly whether they could attend and pay their respects. They were told to stay away. They haven't tried to contact Molly directly, but they did issue a public apology during an interview published in the Casper Star-Tribune. One comment Aaron made to the reporter—"You know in your heart there is nothing you can do"—didn't go over well in Lander, where a memorial fund has been set up for Avery. Aaron says he meant only that he couldn't bring Pete Absolon back to life.
"There's no way to repay Molly," Luke says, "but if she asked us to do something, I'd do my best. I'd like to tell her to her face how sorry I am and be able to offer something. But I don't want it to be seen as an attempt to cover up what I've done."
The Rodolph brothers have left several phone messages for Steve Herlihy, who hasn't spoken to either of them since the accident. Herlihy says he isn't ready to talk to the brothers yet. He's still haunted by his own relentless memories of Leg Lake, including the three words of absolution he offered Luke.
"I regret that, actually," Herlihy says, "but that's how I felt at that point. I feel some responsibility toward Luke. I don't think he did it on purpose... but I feel guilty for not hating him. I feel guilty because of Molly. I lost a guy I knew, my hero. She lost everything.
"Maybe you don't get forgiveness that easily," he adds. "Maybe I need more time. In light of everything, why couldn't he have just looked?"