Ghosts in the Machine
By Andrew Tilin

Ever since profiling Austrian powerhouse Hermann Maier ("Thinking About Machine-Man," November), we've watched with interest as, in the process of tearing through the World Cup ski season (winning five races to date), the Hermanator has proved that he can wreak havoc on more than just the slopes. To celebrate his victory in the Super G at Aspen last December, he overturned furniture at a late-night soiree, then commandeered a 1986 Acura Integra for the sole purpose of cutting doughnuts (the car was later deemed undrivable). Just after sunup, two law-enforcement officers responding to complaints that "juveniles" were firing up a backhoe happened upon Maier, who was furiously pedaling for the airport on a "borrowed" bicycle, toting teammate Andreas Schifferer. The bike was abandoned and a brief chase ensued ù with an embarrassing denouement. "The Hermanator slipped on some ice," scoffs Pitkin County sheriff's deputy Ron Ryan, who removed the handcuffs only after Austrian team officials promised remuneration and discipline. "He had the same look on his face as when he fell at Nagano."

Illustration by Thomas Fluharty